SP-ONSTAGE-OFFICIAL SCRIPT
Script created with Final Draft by Final Draft, Inc.
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12 SCENE 12: THE DOUCHE SCENE-PART 1-BATHROOM
Actor is in sweat pants, standing by a sink with a small
plastic bottle.
PS#1
I think that like the most difficult part
of the day for me would had to have been
the douching and the getting ready for that
part of it, because it took a lot longer
than I thought it was going to take because
you want to make sure you're really ready
to go. I'm gonna just fill this little guy
up.
Starts to fill the bottle.
PS#1 (CONT'D)
You know, one time I did this and was way
too hot. I shoved it up my ass and I was
like, Wow. Fuck. Too hot. And when you
see me my dick will be small, small,
small because there's no turn on to this.
Oh you guys are hurting for film if you
guys are like filming this. I'm just
filling up this little bottle, it's no
big deal. Oh, this is really funny and
it's really important.
Shows the camera the bottle.
PS#1 (CONT'D)
See, I have to make sure that the bottle
is filled up right to the top and that
there's no air in there because if
there's air in there, there's air in me
and it makes me bloated. So, you guys get
to hear all the sounds of it, too.
That'll be great. So, now I'm gonna wipe
my hands here.
Wipes hands, but looks into the camera
PS#1 (CONT'D)
Hi mom, I'm doing this because I love
you. Okay. And my balls will be all
shrunken because it's kinda cold. So now
you get to see me.
Takes down back of his sweats to expose his ass, and bends over
to clean the toilet with toilet paper.
PS#1 (CONT'D)
Oh, and I have to make sure that the
toilet is clean cause you never know
who's been there. You can get a good shot
of my butt now. This butt has paid for
most of my college. My truck. My rent.
And all of my Armani suits. But I guess
everyone in the business already knows
that. Here we go.
Stands up, lowers his pants to his knees, and prepares to
insert the enema.
PS#1 (CONT'D)
Now, I know there's gonna be some fag out
there who'll say, "I can't believe he's
doing that." You know what honey?
Fucking turn your head. Tube up my butt.
Wait, I can't even find it yet. Oh,
there it is. You know, the beginner
people like lay down on the floor like
the instructions tell you. I think that's
great.
Music cue #5 Once In A Lifetime by Talking Heads
PS#1 sits on the toilet and starts to read a magazine. The
camera man continues to film him until finally PS#1 indicates
for him to cut and he does, switching the monitors to blue.
LIGHT CUE: BLACK
CAMERA: BLUE MONITORS
13 SCENE 13: CHI CHI DIRECTING-PART 1
The actors and Chi Chi enter for Chi Chis' shoot. Music
continues to play until they get settled.
LIGHT CUE: GENERAL WASH
CHI
Okay lets do this. Is everybody ready? Is
everybody ready to make a movie? Is
everybody excited?
They all nod yes.
CHI (CONT'D)
Ok fabulous, ok, let's go! When the scene
starts I want you just to be standing by
the pool. And when I yell action just be
skimming the pool, just be skimming the
pool, just be skimming the pool. And you
just film him skimming the pool and you
watch him skim the pool. Then after like
three or four skims I want you to feel his
eyes on the back of your head. Then slowly
turn and see him looking at you, and lock
eyes. Make it really intense. Then look at
him and say,"it sure is hot out here
today." OK? Then just keep looking at him
then start rubbing your crotch really
seductively and say back to him say,"it
sure is." That's good, right? Then, after
that, do something like look up at the sun
or wipe your brow then say,"and I think
it's getting hotter." And then we'll start
the sex and once we get to that I just need
a lot of ass licking and butt-fucking and
cock-sucking and you know what to do, OK?
Just keep it hot and nasty! Okay lets do
this and Action! Wait stop...turn the
fucking camera on I don't see a picture.
When I say action I need to see a fucking
picture. That's how you make a movie
bitch.
All freeze except A#1
LIGHT CUE: CENTER SPOT
A#1
(to audience)
Things happen on sets where models have
like put their foot through a $5000
painting, those needed to be fixed. Or
broke crystal vases or left skid marks on
silk couches.
All unfreeze.
LIGHT CUE: GENERAL WASH
Camera is on and picture appears on the monitor
CHI
Is that my picture? Oh great here we go,
and...Action!
LIGHT CUE: CHAISE LOUNGE
Skims the pool and then says...
PS#3
Sure is hot out here.
PS#2
It sure is.
PS#2 runs his finger lightly over the bulge in his Speedo
CHI
OK, bitch, it's a cock, not a clit. What
are you doing? I said grab the cock. I'm
gonna fuckin throw up. OK, from the top.
Ready? Action!
Skims the pool and then says
PS#3
Sure is hot out here.
PS#2
It sure is
PS#2 grabs the bulge in his Speedos aggressively. PS#3 puts the
skimmer away and starts to walk over slowly to PS#2
CHI
Take your time. Take your time. Nice.
Nice. Get a shot of the bouncing pecs.
Nice. Do not take your eyes off each
other. Nice, Very intense. Keep it
magical. Keep looking at each other. Good.
Now start rubbing your crotches very
seductive. Keeping rubbing. That's hot.
OK, now give me some dialogue.
PS#2 PS#3
(in unison - flatly)
Oh yeah. Yeah. Oh, yeah. That's a nice
piece. Yeah. I want it.
CHI
Be more creative, please. I need better
dialogue.
PS#2 PS#3
Yeah, you gonna give it to me? Yeah, you
want big Daddy? Nice piece. You want
that? Yeah.
CHI
OK, that's enough dialogue, let's move on.
Keep looking at each other and keep rubbing
your crotches. OK, JT, slowly bring your
hand down to his crotch. Slowly. And
slowly, show me the outline of his cock
through his shorts.
PS#3 does this hesitantly with a grimace on his face. PS#2 is
bored. Give me some dialogue please.
PS#2
Oh, that feels great.
PS#3
You like that.
PS#2
Yeah.
CHI
OK, JT. Now slowly reach in his shorts and
slowly pull it out for me. OK?
PS#3 does so with some difficulty. This next scene is done with
a great deal of uncomfortableness and awkwardness.
CHI (CONT'D)
Girl, can you find it? Come on. What
are you doing? It's not a fucking worm.
Grab it, bitch. Put your hands around
it. Hold it lower so it looks bigger.
And point it towards the camera. And, I
want a close up of the piss-slit. OK,
now I want you to open the piss-slit -
make it talk to me. Can you do that?
Yeah, hot - that's nasty! Keep opening
it - open it as wide as you can. I want
to see inside. OK, that's enough piss
slit. Now, JT, bring your leg around
Josh and Josh, you keep jacking off.
No, bitch, not like a propeller - up and
down! Now, JT, I want you to take your
cock and beat on his lips - I want to
hear the sound of it. Ready? Go.
PS#2 makes a sound like he is blowing bubbles.
CHI (CONT'D)
Stop, I don't want to hear that sound.
Never mind. Just fuck his mouth. Hard.
Harder, Harder. OK, Josh, give me some
dialogue
PS#2 makes a sound like he is trying to talk with his mouth
full. Actor#1 does lots of odd camera angles at this point.
CHI (CONT'D)
Girl, what are you doing with the camera?
It looks like the fucking "Blair Witch
Project"! Did you like that fucking
film? Just keep it steady, bitch. Steady
the fucking camera. Keep it on the butt
or the cock - center it. OK, cut there.
LIGHT CUE: GENERAL WASH
Thy are now on a break.
CHI (CONT'D)
That was good. Okay, girl, go get hard.
Grab your little straight magazine and
get nice and hard for me. Then we'll
shoot some more. Really, really good
scene, ladies. It's going really well.
14 SCENE 14: GAY FOR PAY
The following speeches are done to both the audience and the
other actors at the same time as if the audience were sitting
around with the cast. A few times the actors speak only to the
audience and that has been indicated specifically. PS#3 is off
to the side trying to get hard to a straight porn magazine.
CHI
Actually, I'll tell you a really funny
story. I was on a set once in San
Francisco and this straight boy demanded
that he have a Hustler magazine, or he
couldn't get hard, OK? So, at like twelve
midnight we had to drive around San
Francisco, girl.
We had to drive around looking for a
Hustler magazine, OK? In the Castro, OK?
I don't think so, lady!
PS#2
(indicating PS#3)
He was looking at a straight porn magazine,
and he said, "I hope this doesn't offend
you." And I was like no. And my dick was
like, boing. It's true. He's straight.
He's what they call in the industry "gay
for pay".
PS#3
(to the audience)
But what can I do?
A#1
Well the big three superstars in the
industry are Jeff Stryker, Ryan Idol and
Rex Chandler. Now, the odd thing about that
is all three of them are straight.
Supposedly!
CHI
Oh, please girl. I'll tell you that
straight industry doesn't pay as much. If
that straight industry paid as much, all
these straight boys would be screwing the
girls for as much money as they're screwing
the boys. Because, I'll tell you right now,
it's all about the money, OK?
Chi Chi exits and A#1 sits in the empty directors chair.
PS#3
(to audience only)
This industry is more like a family kind of
thing. They treat you like an individuals.
They treat you as an individual. The other
industry, you're nothing but a dick.
PS#1
(on toilet, for whole section)
Yeah, well I'm not real crazy about it. I
mean, it's like us going in to a gay bar
and seeing straight strippers. Here we are
giving our gay money and taking it out of
the gay community and giving it to these
straight guys who stand in front of us and
laugh and call us fags all the way home.
PS#2
A lot of people don't like working with the
"gay for pay" guys. The ones who are
straight. I like it. It turns me on.
A#1
Bring them in. Let them work, if they want
to. How straight could they possibly be is
what always the question that I ask. I was
on a set once and I said to the guy,
"Honey, you may have been straight when you
walked in here, but you sure are gay now.
Because we all just saw what you just got
done doing." Right? So, I always question
just how straight are the "gay for pay"
guys anyway? Couldn't be too, be too
straight.
Gino enters during this next speech to wash his hands in the
bathroom sink.
LIGHT CUE: BEDROOM ONLY
PS#3
(to audience only)
People guessing about my sexuality...most
of the time they all understand that I'm
straight and can deal with you. You can
always tell about a person by the way that
they act, the way that they carry
themselves. There might be a few people
who think different but...
LIGHT CUE: GENERAL WASH
GINO
(wiping his hands with towel)
You know what, I don't buy it all. And I've
worked with so many guys who claim they're
straight and stress they're straight. And
frankly, they're the best cocksuckers
around.
All the actors point and snicker at PS#3.
GINO (CONT'D)
These are people who have this bisexual
thing inside of them, it's like screaming
to get out. And the only way they can do it
with another man is by doing a gay movie.
Then they can say, "But I was paid to do
it." Yeah, right. That's there permission
to do it.
PS#1
Yeah, well you know what? I don't believe
that they're straight. I mean. I'll give
them bisexual. But I will not give them
straight. A prototypical straight boy
wouldn't even go near the thought of having
sex with another man.
PS#2
Although, let's flip the coin, I mean, it I
were asked to do a straight movie and I had
to fuck a girl, I would do it in a second
and I don't consider myself straight in any
way, shape, or form. I'm totally gay. But I
would fuck a girl in a bi movie. With no
problem. So what? Does that make me
straight?
GINO, PS#1, A#1
Hmmm...
LIGHT CUE: CHAISE LOUNGE ONLY
PS#2
(to audience only)
That's the thing, I think, about this
industry. Everyone's sexual boundaries
become very blurred. Because you work with
people who are called "gay for pay" and
they come with their girlfriends and an
hour later you're fucking them. And I don't
have a small dick. I have quite a big dick.
And they take it. And they love it. And
they cum. And then they go back home and
they're straight. So, you know, if you're
working in the industry they appear to be
straight to you. But probably, if you're on
the outside looking in, they're bent.
LIGHT CUE: GENERAL WASH
PS#1
So, okay, let's say you went and did that
scene. So, what are you gonna consider
yourself bi?
PS#2
No not at all. Because I don't consider
myself attracted to women at all.
A#1
Well, that's a good point. Because, you
don't do it on a regular basis.
PS#2
But you're getting paid to have sex with a
female so you'd do it.
A#1
Ah, see? That's true. I don't know. Chi
Chi returns.
15 SCENE 15: CHI CHI DIRECTING-PART 2
CHI
Okay let's finish this.
(indicating A#1)
Girl, I know you're not in my chair.
A#1 quickly vacates the chair.
CHI (CONT'D)
OK, let's go. JT, are you aroused?
PS#3
Getting there.
CHI
OK, everyone, let's get into position. Are
you all ready? Let's finish this up. Go
back to where you were. JT, you were on
top of Josh. You were fucking his face.
Josh, your cock is out and you're jacking
it off. So, what I want you to do is beat
your cock on his lips like you did before.
But I do not want to hear that sound. OK,
let me hear it. Ready? And action.
LIGHT CUE: CHAISE LOUNGE
PS#2 makes a popping sound.
CHI (CONT'D)
OK, now I have a fucking fish tank.
That's lovely. Forget the sound affects.
Look, I don't want to hear anything.
Just fuck his mouth, JT. Fuck it harder.
And, Josh, keep jacking off - stay awake,
lady. OK, now what I want you to do - can
you hear me Josh? I want you to reach
up, slowly put your hands at the top of
JT's butt, and slowly, SLOWLY, pull his
shorts down so that his ass is slowly
revealed. OK? Go.... God, that's a hot
butt! That's a hot butt! Nice. Nice.
Hot. Can you pull the shorts down
farther? There, that's perfect. Nice.
Hot. Now, rub it all around - rub it
like a crystal ball! And, JT, keep
fucking his face. OK, now Josh, give his
ass a wack.
PS#2 slaps PS#3's ass, and PS#3 gives out a faint cry, which
Chi Chi admonishes
CHI (CONT'D)
Girl, try and enjoy it. Another wack.
Zip it. Zip, zip, zip. And another
wack.
PS#2 starts to play patty cake on PS#3's ass.
CHI (CONT'D)
That's very funny, bitch. I don't need
the games. Just get into his ass. Just
rub his ass. I don't need the pattycake
bullshit. Just rub his ass. OK, Josh,
what I want you to do - JT, keep fucking
his face. You both keep falling asleep
on me. Josh, I want you to reach your
hands right inside of his ass crack, and
I want you to spread his ass as far as
you can and show me his hole. And, I
want you to get a tight shot of his ass.
OK? Go.
PS#2 pulls PS#3's ass wide open, and PS#3 cries out again.
CHI (CONT'D)
I don't need the sound affects. Now,
give me a good shot of his hole. Zoom in.
Get some light in there. Tighter.
Tighter. I want to see what the bitch
ate for breakfast. Open it up. OK, now
JT, can you wink it for me? I want you
to wink your butt hole at me. Yes,
that's my shot. Yes, yes, keep winking.
That's perfect. That's hot! Perfect.
Let's move on.
LIGHT CUE: BLACK
CAMERA: BLUE MONITORS
Music cue #6 Penthouse And Pavement by Heaven 17
Chi Chi cast exits.
16 SCENE 16: THE DOUCHE SCENE-PART 2-BATHROOM
LIGHT CUE: BATHROOM
CAMERA: PS#1 IN BATHROOM
Music fades out. When all is silent PS#1 speaks.
PS#1
(still on toilet)
You know, I've done a lot of things. I used
to answer 911 calls. I've been a waiter. A
cocktail waiter. I've uh, you know, life
threatening jobs. But I have to say that
this is the hardest job I ever done. OK,
now I have to push, because I want to make
sure there's nothing else up there. Am I
turning red? I can't believe I'm letting
you guys film all of this. Okay, now that
I'm done pushing, I'm gonna start wiping
and cleaning, and cleaning and wiping until
I'm sure it's absolutely clean. And, when
I'm just about done wiping, I'm gonna stick
my finger up there, just a skosh, to make
sure that it's totally clean. OK, this
should do it. Yes, now, that's a clean
butt. This butt is clean!
17 SCENE 17: PARENTS SECTION
A#1
(to PS#1, still filming him)
So do you parents know you're in the porn
industry?
PS#1
(into camera)
When I told my dad that I was doing porn,
he kind of smirked and said, "Let me just
pretend that it's with women."
PS#2 enters and sits on the weight bench.
LIGHT CUE: WEIGHT BENCH AREA
A#1
(to PS#2, filming him)
Do your parents know that you're in the
porno industry?
PS#2
(into camera)
No.
A#1
And what would they say?
PS#2
I have no idea.
PS#3 crosses across the stage but stays center while he answers
the question.
LIGHT CUE: CENTER SPOT
A#1
(to PS#3, filming him)
What about you? Do your parents know that
you're in the porno industry?
PS#3
No.
A#1
And what would they say?
PS#3
They'd probably turn over in their grave.
LIGHT CUE: WEIGHT BENCH AREA
CAMERA: PICTURES OF PARENTS
PS#2
(to the audience)
You know, I'd like to tell them. I'd
really, really like to tell them. Because I
feel like each day that I go on not telling
them or, you know, asking them, or not
telling them what I'm doing, I feel like
I'm betraying them. But, you know, to me,
it's something that I just have so much fun
doing it that if I told them and they
didn't want me to do it, I would listen to
them and then, you know, I just wouldn't be
happy.
PS#2 enters with the supply box and sits in the bedroom set
on the bed. A#1 has finished filming the pictures of the
parents and now sits on the end of the chaise lounge.
LIGHT CUE: BEDROOM
PS#1
(to audience)
My parents finally revealed to me that they
watched porn. You know, that they were all
into porn themselves. My dad especially. He
was so shocked that I actually knew Sharon
Kane. As PS#1 refers to Sharon Kane he
holds up her fake plastic vagina!
LIGHT CUE: CHAISE LOUNGE
A#1
(to audience)
One thing that's very true about the porn
industry is all these guys arrive from the
Midwest to do porn thinking that their
parents will never see it, because they
come from the Midwest. That is absolutely a
load of crap. You know, I could tell you a
really, really horrible story, and I will,
about a very famous porn actor who hadn't
told his parents that he was doing gay
porn. His parents came to visit him in Los
Angeles. His father was wandering through
West Hollywood and all of a sudden...
LIGHT CUE: BEDROOM ADDED
PS#1 unrolls a big porn poster.
A#1 (CONT'D)
...there's this huge poster of his son with
all these guys, like, kneeling around him
and everything. And the father caught the
next plane back home. I mean, I think
that's a heart-breaking story. Gino enters
briskly.
LIGHT CUE: GENERAL WASH
18 SCENE 18: GINO DIRECTS-PART 1-SUCKING
GINO
Guys, let's shoot this scene. Do you have
the guidelines?
PS#1
You know what, I can't find them.
GINO
Did you bring the guidelines?
A#1
I brought 'em, I can't find 'em.
PS#2
What guidelines. What are you talking
about?
GINO
It's a list of the things we cannot do in
the sex scenes we shoot for Leisure Time
Entertainment. They have a psychologist on
duty and he monitors every scene, and if
it's not politically correct, he tosses it
out. Won't even use it.
PS#2
I have no idea what you're talking about.
PS#1
Oh, it's alot of bullshit!
GINO
And I haven't shot in a month and I left my
list at home, so I'll have to go by memory.
PS#2
Guidelines, I feel like I'm in school!
PS#1
You'll get used to it.
GINO
Guys, listen, 'cause this is really
important. No slapping, no forcing, no four
letter words. Words like cunt, fuck, cock &
piss. But you can say suck and you can say
dick. But it depends how you say them. Like
for instance, you can't say to him, "Eat my
butt" or "suck my dick," because that's
giving an order. But you can say, "Would
you like to suck my dick?" or "please eat
my butt." You'd have to say to your scene
partner, "Would you like to eat my butt?"
And keep your hands to yourselves. Now for
example, you can't have your hand on his
head while he's sucking you, because it
looks like you're forcing him against his
will, so guys, keep your hands to
yourselves. And please, no religious
overtones. I had this one actress on the
set, Teri Weigel, Playboy Centerfold, and
every word out of her mouth was, "Oh God,
oh Jesus, oh Mary... I'm cumming." And we
had to remove all her dialogue and use
music. So guys, keep the dialogue very
vanilla?
PS#1
What, what did you say? Keep it vanilla?
GINO
The dialogue, not the sex. And don't be
campy.
PS#1
What, me? I won't be campy. Gino leads PS#1
down to the weight bench area.
LIGHT CUE: WEIGHT BENCH AREA
GINO
Come on, guys. Give me a hot scene, two hot
guys who are into each other. And make
noise. I don't use music in these movies so
you have to give me lots of natural sound.
Just explode. You know the blocking. Let's
loosen up, breathe, breathe. Ready? Let's
see the shot. Okay! Let's roll tape.
A#1
Rolling!
GINO
And ACTION!
LIGHT CUE: WEIGHT BENCH AREA
PS#1
We can't go up there. My girlfriend's
upstairs sleeping.
GINO
Cut! Cut! It's not "girlfriend", it's
"sister".
PS#1
Oh, I'm sorry.
GINO
Now be honest, if the dialogue's too
complicated, I can cut it. Can you handle
it?
PS#1
Yeah, I think so.
GINO
Are you sure? Let's go guys. Places. Roll
tape.
A#1
Rolling!
GINO
Take two, and ACTION!
PS#1
We can't go up there. My sister's up there
sleeping.
PS#2
What?
PS#1
We can't go up there, she's sleeping.
PS#2
Your sister's upstairs sleeping?
PS#1
I know, let's go out in the garage and pump
some iron.
PS#2
Okay, great!
They move to bench press area. PS#1 lays on bench while PS#2
stands behind weight bar. If they are walking into the weight
bench area from another area there should be a light cue to
remove the light from the area they were in.
LIGHT CUE: WEIGHT BENCH AREA
PS#1
Hey, dude. What don't you come over here
and spot me?
PS#2
Sure.
GINO
Make noise.
PS#1
Thanks.
PS#2
Sure.
They begin pumping and making work-out/breathing noises.
Cameraman moves in for close-ups.
GINO
(to cameraman)
Extreme close-up of the eyes.
Their eyes starting winking at each other as cameraman takes
turns shooting each guy's close-up twice.
PS#1
You look really sexy.
PS#2
Thanks. You're fucking gorgeous.
PS#1
Is it gonna be okay out here in the garage?
PS#2
I guess.
PS#1
Well, we'll just have to make do with what
we've got.
PS#2
I guess.
They begin to make out like animals, growling and grabbing, both
standing.
GINO
Cut! Cut! Cut! You know what?
(thinking)
I think it would look a lot better if you
give him head first.
PS#2
Give who?
GINO
(to PS#1)
You give him head first. So guys, we'll
pick it up with the same thing. That
changes the camera angle, so move over
there. But that was all great - the
growling, the embracing, the energy was
really good. Let's go from that same point.
Let's roll.
A#1
Rolling.
GINO
Take a breath guys. ACTION!
They resume the scene and start to pull each others pants
down. PS#2 begins slapping PS#1's ass.
PS#2
Ooh, yeah!
PS#1
Ooh, yeah. Yeah, that's it. Harder. Ooh
yeah. That's it! Yeah! Yeah!
GINO
Cut! Cut! Guys, you know what I'm going to
tell you. Guidelines! No slapping!
PS#1
What? That little bit if gonna offend some
psychologist?
GINO
Yes. Won't even use it.
PS#1
Can he, I don't know, massage it hard or
something?
GINO
He can massage but not hard. If it looks
like he forcing or hurting you, can't use
it. You know what? On second thought, why
don't you lay on the bench. We'll just
dissolve into it. Hang your head over the
bench. Your head is hanging over the bench,
he's fucking your mouth. Lay on your back.
PS#1
Like that?
GINO
Hang your head over.
PS#1
Like that?
GINO
More.
PS#1
You want more?
GINO
More. Perfect!
They have sex for a few beats then Gino turns to the audience
and everyone else freezes.
LIGHT CUE: SPOT ON GINO
GINO (CONT'D)
(to the audience)
You know the straight sets are a lot
different than the gay sets, because on the
straight sets the girls don't know how to
suck dick properly. We have to show them.
So I'll hold class. I'll take a cucumber, a
carrot, whatever I can get my hands on and
I'll give a demonstration. You give me one
hour, just one hour with those chicks and I
make them absolute pigs. When I get done
with them, they'll take the balls in their
mouth, the cock down their throat, both at
the same time, and they won't come up for
air.
LIGHT CUE: WEIGHT BENCH AREA
PS#2
So, it's just more play, play, stroke,
stroke, suck, suck, right?
GINO
Yes.
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